:| Not amused. ( Not yet, anyway... )

So, Kat just went out to visit her Mum in hospital.

I need to finish an advert for Section 8 to go into the next 3 Max Power magazines.

Morgan's eating dinner, Lee's dozing in the lounge in his car seat.



And then the nightmare begins...

Deadline for this ad is, as far as I know, tomorrow morning.
So I, like, REALLY need to be working on it right now so it's finished and in the right format. Got a few folk helping me out, but I still need to be here tweaking.

So, of course, Morgan appears next to me, face all ketchup, demanding either TV or sweeties... I'm uncertain which.

Then, obviously, Lee starts screaming for no reason.
So hard he GIVES himself a reason, by shitting himself.

So I change Lee... And Morgan resumes her endless repetition of "MorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwanteeeeseeees..."

I finally get him finished, and manage to get him sitting on a beanbag, watching TV.
Then I turn to look at Morgan.

"MorganwanteeeeseeeesMorganwan..."
Silence.

Never good.

Puddle.

REALLY never good.


So, I take her pants off, and her skirt, and put them in the wash.
And I tell her to go get a nappy from her room.
She's now in sulk mode, so refuses.

I point out that she's not getting the ham sannitch she asked for if she doesn't.

Morgan is in the habit of sitting on the stairs crying if she's in a huff.
I figured she was doing just that.

Told her "Go get a nappy. NOW!"
"No! No nappy! *Cry*"

After 5 or 6 minutes of this, Lee starts again.
And this isn't crying. It's SCREAMING!

Goes right through you, makes your ears actually hurt.
Tried feeding him, tried changing him... Cuddles, dummy, toys, the lot.

Then I look up.


I see the little arm, up on the ceiling.
I see the little hand, on the end of the little arm.
I see the little finger, on the little hand, on the end of the little arm.

Stuck in the goddamn smoke detector.


So, I go up to remove said finger from said plastic smoke detector.
Pulling does nothing.
I THEN notice the metal mesh just inside the plastic shell of the smoke detector... Morgan's sodding finger is under and past this mesh, so if she pulls, it just sticks harder - Like an old fashioned letterbox.


I should also point out that she's still naked save for a T-shirt at this point, having decnded to investigate the detector en route to her cache of nappies.

So, one ladder-fetching and screwdriver-poking later, and she's out and OK.

Lee's still screaming.

I get a nappy, and put Lee into it.

Then the phone goes.
Then the OTHER phone goes.
Then the door goes...

All three of THOSE dealt with ( Hi Mark, Claire and Claire's Sister. Good to see y'all, even briefly! ), I try to go back to the ad.
Lee's now sitting happily in his car seat once more.

Then the phone goes.
I go to answer it, and all of a sudden, Lee's screaming again.

And Morgan's holding a small plastic monkey.
Another plastic monkey is in Lee's car seat.

And Lee is face down on the floor.


Scenario duly constructed, Morgan duly chastised, Lee duly cuddled and make-sure-he's-OK-ed... I sit down to finish the bloody ad off.

And Lee starts screaming again, while Morgan keeps trying to take my hand off the mouse, and demanding jelly.


If Photoshop crashes now, there will be a killing spree.

Big one.