See if we weren't so concerned with "keeping the peace"?

I'd say that anyone with the nerve to sit in their nice big posh house, and say to someone who's struggling to afford all they want to do for their wedding as it is... "Oh, well, if X, Y and Z family member aren't invited to your wedding
I don't know if we can make it"

... Has one hell of a nerve, and can just bugger off and not bother coming, then.

But we are, so I can't.
Pffft.