"Is that... PUBES?!?!"

The Electric Ballroom.

Been there a few times in the past for "Full Tilt".
Now, the club night is "Sin City".

The changes I'd been informed about included a switch in music policy - The huge floor now plays metal etc. and upstairs is a bit more Bling... And that they now had cage dancers.

Both of these statements are true.
However:

The DJs - All 4 or 5 of them, or however many folk were in the booth - Are really, really good at completely and utterly ignoring folk standing there waiting to request a song.
Seriously - Even when I'm alone in the booth ( Usually... ) I still make sure that I speak to anyone waiting as soon as I can.
I don't stand and chat, or browse CDs, or dance about and wave my hands at the crowd as if they're there to look at ME.
Not when folk are waiting, anyway ;)
I also make a point of leaving borrowed CDs somewhere easy to see should the owner come back. I'm now down one mix CD and Thumper's down a scabby CD wallet as a result of this.

The security - What the hell is their job anyway?
OK, the on-door searches were done well... But in-club stewarding?
no evidence of that at all.
As Julie, Kat, Thumper and I were sitting taking a breather, some REALLY drunk dude passed out on the bench next to us. A number of bouncers walked right on by, totally ignored him. A few even looked at him, but walked on.
If that was the Catty, he'd have been gonez0red in seconds!

Then there was the silly little short-skirt-and-stockings-clad cow who spent most of the night sitting down on the dancefloor.
She clearly decided after a few hours of this that the general populace didn't have QUITE a good enough view of her fanny, so she LAY DOWN!
You heard me - She was lying down on the dancefloor.
Then she had the cheek to stand up and chase one poor sod who tripped over her, and give him dog's abuse for daring to not notice her... as she LAY ON THE DANCEFLOOR!

Arsehole of a girl.

Think that's bad?
What about pile-ons?
Again... On the dancefloor. We watched a 10-man pile-on take place, and again nothing was done about it by staff.

The cage dancers were crap - If they thought they were dancin' sexy, then clearly London Sexy is very much different to Glasgow Sexy.
And one of 'em really had her pants too low... We were convinced - Until close examination proved us wrong - that her untrimmed bush was bursting out over the elastic.
It was just the shadow of her belly though.
Add that to the ungainly, clumsy attempts at being slinky, the fact that one got her foot trapped in the cage, and the general half-assedness of it, and it really didn't work well at all.

I hate to say it, as I loved the place the first few times I was there, but I doubt I'll be back.
They even closed the chill-out room early.

Julie thought we were angry with her, because she pulled some random dude and spent her usual 10 minutes saying goodnight, when we'd told her we wanted to go NOW as we weren;t sure how to get back to Hackney at night ( Kat had forgotten the card with the address of the flat on it. )
Worked out alright - We got a bus within minutes, and it turns out that getting to Hackney by night is actually FAR easier than by day! The night bus runs an extended route, whereas the day bus stops well short.

Zzzzzz...